Congratulations! A new little star has joined your family, making your heart brim with love. Yet, there’s already a small storm on the loose—your toddler! Surviving the first month with a newborn and a toddler is like riding a frenzied emotional merry-go-round, speckled with sleepless nights and those irresistible moments of gooey cuteness. Fear not, mum, you’re in good company.
Our guide is packed with down-to-earth advice to help you through this special time. We’ll explore how to juggle rest and encourage a lovely bond between your youngsters.
The Emotional Rollercoaster
The first month with a newborn is a whirlwind. One moment, you’re lost in love, marvelling at your little miracle. The next moment, exhaustion hits you so hard that you see stars. It’s a mix of emotions—happiness, irritation, worry, and sometimes guilt—all competing for your attention. It’s understandable. Your body is healing from childbirth, your hormones are erratic, and the lack of sleep and caring for a toddler can make anyone feel swamped.
The trick is to embrace these feelings, not suppress them. Chat with your partner, a mate, or family—someone who’ll listen without judgement. Remember, you’re in good company; many mothers have been through this intense journey.
Managing Sleep (Deprivation) Like a Pro
Sleep becomes a rare gem during the first month with a newborn, especially with a toddler already in your world. Those dreamy eight-hour sleeps? Pure fantasy. Yet, don’t lose hope! Try these proven tips to fight off sleeplessness. Embrace quick naps. Ditch long sleep-ins for brief, rejuvenating naps. Catch 20 minutes of rest when your newborn does—it’s a game changer. Team up at night: Share the nighttime care with your partner, swapping feeds and nappy changes. It guarantees both of you some solid sleep.

Set a bedtime routine: A calm routine—bath, massage, soft singing—signals bedtime for your newborn and toddler alike. Stay flexible: Newborns don’t stick to plans. Adjust your sleep times as needed, even if it means dozing on the couch. Lower your sleep goals: Forget about unbroken night sleep. Snatch short sleep spells instead. These can significantly boost your energy and mood.
Feeding Frenzy: Nourishing Your Newborn and Toddler
During the first month with a newborn, prepare for round-the-clock feedings! This period is critical for your baby and any older children who may feel overlooked. Here’s how to keep everyone content and fed during these busy times. Choose between breastfeeding, bottle-feeding, or combining the two for your infant. Discuss the best option with your midwife or health visitor. If breastfeeding feels challenging at first, seek support from a lactation consultant; they’re invaluable. Bottle feeding provides flexibility; remember, the priority is feeding your baby, regardless of the method.
Your toddler might struggle to adjust to the new family member, showing signs like increased fussiness or changes in eating habits. This is expected. Show patience, offer varied and healthy food choices, and make mealtimes interactive by introducing new finger foods or involving them in snack preparation. It’s okay if they don’t clear their plate every time. Creating a family feeding routine that includes your newborn and toddler can help maintain harmony.
Taming the Tantrums: Managing Toddler Meltdowns
Facing the first month with a newborn or toddler can make daily life challenging. Toddlers, craving attention, might feel sidelined by the arrival of a new sibling. To head off tantrums, watch for signs like hunger or a full nappy—quick fixes here can prevent a meltdown. Distraction works wonders; shift their focus with a new activity, a song, a story, or a peek-a-boo game with the baby.
Acknowledge their feelings gently if a tantrum does break out, offering a cuddle or praise for verbalising their emotions instead of shouting. This period is a big adjustment for your toddler, too.
Sharing is Caring: Fostering Sibling Love
The first month with a newborn is a chaotic adventure. Suddenly, a new tiny person demands endless attention, and your toddler might feel a bit lost, unsure of their new role. It’s crucial to help them find their feet in this changed family landscape and foster a strong bond between siblings. Involve them by making them a ‘big helper’. Even small tasks, like passing wipes during nappy changes or singing to the baby, can make them feel valued and part of the team. Shared story times are a fantastic way to nurture this bond, with books about brothers and sisters highlighting the ups and downs of sibling life in a way they can understand.
Equally important is ensuring you set aside moments just for them, affirming they’re still as important as ever. These snippets of time—playing with blocks, delving into their favourite story, or cuddling on the couch—are golden. Strong sibling relationships don’t happen overnight; there might be a few hiccups. However, with patience and these strategies, you’re laying the foundation for a lifetime of friendship and laughter between your children.
Asking for Help: You Don’t Have to Do This Alone
Attention, mums! Surviving the first month with a newborn can feel like a marathon, even more so if you already have a tot keeping you busy. Feeling swamped, tired, and a bit lost is all part of the package. Remember, you’re not expected to be a superhero. It’s not about being the most independent parent out there. It’s okay to lean on your support network—be it your partner, relatives, or mates.
Let your partner take over the toddler’s bath time so you can grab some sleep, or a mate could cook up a meal to save you the hassle. It’s alright to seek help with chores and errands or have someone hold your baby while you shower quickly. A content and well-rounded mum leads to a content and well-rounded family. Asking for help is a strength, not a weakness; it’s recognising you’re human.
Conclusion
First month with a newborn? You’ve nailed it! Those fuzzy weeks have become a new rhythm, your heart brimming with love for your little ones. A massive well done for getting through the endless nights, the mountain of washing, and the mix of giggles and tears.
Now, it’s time to cheer for the small wins—that first grin, the sound of recognition, those shaky first steps. This month has reshaped your family, leaving you more challenging, enduring, and completely in love.